It took me a while and feels like forever to write this piece. I know that I’ve just turned 27 last month, but I couldn’t think of something worth writing about this birthday. Besides that I feel like I got no progress in my life, I also kinda certain that I have made a wrong decision related to my career. However, “those who make no mistakes are the ones who do nothing”, so I thought by writing about my mistake could inspire other people about making decisions.
“If I could turn back time…” “If I had the resources and supports to achieve my goals…” These kind of things always torture me as if they lock me with “regret chains”. The point is, I’m currently regretting what I thought was a career breakthrough: After being a journalist for 3,5 years, I jumped and took a job offer as an External Communication in a subsidiary of a state-owned enterprise. (In my country, state-owned enterprises are considered best companies to work in, and that’s the old paradigm that still exists but not relevant anymore).
I’ve just realized that I can’t simply go to office and work. Sitting in a cubicle for about 10 hours (or more) is like being jailed, because my mind will wander and thinking about moving. Maybe it’s only because I get used to moving to several places a day and get free drinks and beverages. I know I have to be grateful for everything God has given to me, I have a steady job and I just need to steal some hours of my leisure time to writing. Sometimes it’s just simple things, like if you want to be good in writing, you have to make time to actually type the words, not just thinking.
I feel silly that I’ve been complaining about not having enough time to do things that I love because this new job. Because hell, I didn’t write more posts either when I had a lot of free time in my previous job. The problem is I am too easily depressed and demotivated by the fact that most of my friends’ careers have taken off more than my own. Normally, I should turn that jealousy into positive motivation, not wasting my time looking up at the great things that will come my way and planning my future happiness and not nearly enough time looking down and thinking about how badly I used to want so many of the things I currently have.
Time is precious, and we all get the same amount of 24 hours a day. I should be grateful and not let my mind wanders around like a dementor. It doesn’t consume other people’s happiness, but it sucks out my soul. I am glad I can have all the time and access to learn and develop my writing, and to improve everyday if I only I can tame my mind.
“Happiness is a state of mind, which can be independent of feelings.” The quote by Xandria Ooi, a motivational speaker who gives concise and commanding talks that I’ve been enjoying and greatly benefiting from. One of her talks, “Pleasure and happiness”, reminds me in a bold way that I do have control to make my life to be happy and meaningful.
“Our lives are filled with challenges, problems, frustrations, disappointments, illnesses… so if we think “I’ll be happy when my life is free of this problem or burden”, then we’re just going to spend 90% of our time not happy. Because the truth is that as long as we’re human, our lives are never be absolutely absent of problems or challenges.
So as long as we have a conscious mind, we can practice building the strength of the mind so that it sees the positive in every situation. We need our minds to be in the best possible state, to be healthy and positive, so that even through the challenging times, we are not slaves to it.”
Life will be much much easier if we can be the master of our mind. And the true winner in life is the ones who have conquered no other but their own minds.
I hope by getting older I could also getting wiser, and able to appreciate life, and embrace its challenges. If we can see problems from different perspectives, we will see they are challenges that are for us, not against us. And I promise I won’t ever give up in pursuing happiness by doing what I love – writing, and I hope I can help others with my experience. Doing what you love require work ethics. I know it’s damn hard, but the only impossible journey is the one that you don’t take. So keep creating new moments and learning new lessons everyday from your great life, you just have to train your own mind to see the good in everything.